I’ve been in Nashville for nearly a week, and each day is full of sweet surprises. I’m staying with my dear friends Raphe (yes, that’s his real name) and Tiffany (also her real name.) When we are addressing them collectively we call them Raphany, just so you know.
The walls of their apartment are painted turquoise – and on top of the turquoise are Bible verses and random sayings and silly pictures all drawn on with chalk – contributed by Raphany and any friends who have come to visit. I have yet to decided what my chalk art will be. I’m thinking perhaps a gnome of some sort. Every home should have a gnome.
On the first or second day I was staying with Raphany I couldn’t find my toothbrush – I’m pretty sure their cat ran off with it. While I was looking for it Raphe said I could just use his toothbrush, so I did… and have been ever since. I’m not sure if he knows that I’m still using it, but I know he wouldn’t care. It makes me happy to have these kind of friends.
Now, let me tell you about their cat. They have the craziest cat I’ve ever been around. But really. It’s like a young child with an extreme case of ADHD – and then some. I wouldn’t be surprised if this cat swallowed my toothbrush whole. If you ever have your feet exposed he will attack them – the only way to avoid this is to hide your feet under blankets. If you have long hair their cat will literally bite it, jump up and grab it, claw it, the works. When we were hanging out on Raphany’s room we had to close the door and then put a chair and a fan in front of the door to keep the cat out. I thought that was a bit extreme, but when I heard the thumping and saw the claw reaching in from under the door, I wanted to put the bed in front of the door as well.
…if you open the refrigerator the cat will climb in and refuse to leave. Sometimes we leave him in there on purpose (and in those moments we breathe and remember that life is good), but then we are worried he will eat all our food. So we let him out. One time he climbed and clambered all over my computer while I was using it – the result was my computer started talking in a robotic voice. No lie. Everything I did – every time I clicked on something or opened something the computer would narrate what I was doing. It was pretty freaky. Finally I googled “how to make my mac computer stop talking” and I discovered that there are actually a lot of people out there who have had the same problem. Solidarity, folks. It’s my favorite.
So yeah. Right now I’m just hoping to leave Raphany’s alive. Yesterday the cat had an episode that left Tiffany and my sister Melody with bloody scratches. I’m thinking about remaking Alfred Hitchcok’s horror movie The Birds into a hip rendition called The Cat. Specifically Raphany’s cat, though right now I’m having images of a herd of cats attacking people’s feet. Then it could be called The Cats, and then there could be this whole birds vs. cats thing – kind of like a Freddy vs. Jason thing. We’ll see.
One more thing: We’ve been watching a lot of Gilmore Girls lately. Because, honestly, can anyone resist the charm of Stars Hallow or the sexual tension between Luke and Lorelai? I think not. Well, a few days ago we made a new friend who has lived in L.A. and was an extra in a bunch of TV shows (additionally, and perhaps more importantly, he was a “hand” stand-in for Ewan McGregor, so that’s pretty cool.) Turns out this guy was an extra on Gilmore Girls! Season seven. Basically all my dreams have come true now.
Welp. That’s about all I have to report for today. Peace outttt.